life works in ways i don't understand. but it's not necessarily a bad thing though.

im a terrible person. im a non practising christian. im born one, but i quit going to church since 12 (cuz i don't like my church, i believe in god, but i don't believe in churches) and i hardly pray.

but when im frightened, or feel helpless, then i'll pray! haha im horrible, i only pray when i need help. (but i also do pray to thank god whenever anything good happens to me)

i wonder how about people without religions? like when im in the dark alone (ok i am very frightened of the dark) i'll pray to god to keep me safe. at least i feel better. i wonder what with people without religions do? they don't possibly pray to anything? if i don't pray to god to keep me safe i will really feel 100% alone and even more frightened. not promoting anything here, just wondering what do others do when they're scared and alone. hmmm maybe they'll ask their grandparents/great grandparents in heaven to look over them?

im very good at creating a natural look like i didn't put makeup.


looks very natural right!!!! too bad it's not natural. my eyes aren't natural. they're eyeliner + circle lens you see. anyway i love my hair here, i wish they're like this all the time, straight with volume. it always has volume, but it's always so wavy and curly! @_@

this is 100% natural me

and this is already one of the better pictures ~.~ for circle lens, you may not think there is much difference (just look at the eyes only) but when you look at the whole picture somehow you'll wonder how come it's uglier but you cannot tell why.

i look more mature here


so happy ^^ yesterday more makeup came in the mail. so now ive got 5 more full sizes and about 7 more samples of eyeshadow :D haha my mom is getting a little mad at me for buying more and more makeup from time to time.

it's sunday mar 8th now

yay~ kisaki project on my radio blog~ i miss listening to jui's voice!

i finally bought one bottle of nfu-oh nail polish yesterday!!!!!!! the nail polish is so so so so so gorgeous! seriously, no other nail polish has such a nice effect like nfu oh! plus nfu oh nail polish also allows you to apply it in a way that gives you an acrylic nail effect (like gradients of colours) which normal nail polish cannot! (the nice lady at the shop taught me how to) actually i wanted to buy three colours in total, but 2 were out of stock, but they'll call me up once they stock up next week ^^ but i'll only be free to go down about 2 weeks later though.

however the bottle i received yesterday had a faulty brush and while trying to repair the brush i pulled it out instead!!!! so i think im gonna buy some polish remover later and remove the polish off a nail brush from an old bottle and find some way to put it in this new bottle.

anyway yesterday was my mom's 52th birthday!!! haha but when she tells her age to many people they cannot believe it, they think she's in her thirties -_____-|| personally i don't think she looks that young, i guess she doesn't look 52, but she definitely look older than 30 plus!

an old purikura i took with her~ maybe you might remember it, i think it was taken in aug 2007.

yes i had a major image revamp since then. i look so natural (it's fake though!! hahaha) and different now! :D my mom looks about the same except that purikura machines are very kind and don't capture your wrinkles so in real life she has more wrinkles that's all.

btw my dad has rheumatism. it started off a few weeks ago when he had some pain in his foot. anyway last week the doctor said he has rheumatism and should stay away from red meat and nuts and alcohol and i think he is a bit upset. well, he need not worry, since he has to cut down on red meat, it means we'll cook less red meat dishes for the family and we would be cutting down along with him so he has the family to join him in eating less red meat ^^ a bit sad, i love red meat. but my mom is like you better watch what you eat now unless you wanna get all sorts of ailments in future.

i love lamb chops/rack of lamb! :D